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All’s Well That Ends Well: Act 4, Scene 3

All’s Well That Ends Well
Act 4, Scene 3

The Florentine camp.

  1. Enter the two French Lords and some two or three Soldiers.

First French Lord Dumaine

2
  1. You have not given him his mother’s letter?

Second French Lord Dumaine

3 - 5
  1. I have deliv’red it an hour since. There is something in’t
  2. that stings his nature; for on the reading it he chang’d
  3. almost into another man.

First French Lord Dumaine

6 - 7
  1. He has much worthy blame laid upon him for shaking off so
  2. good a wife and so sweet a lady.

Second French Lord Dumaine

8 - 11
  1. Especially he hath incurr’d the everlasting displeasure of
  2. the King, who had even tun’d his bounty to sing happiness to
  3. him. I will tell you a thing, but you shall let it dwell
  4. darkly with you.

First French Lord Dumaine

12 - 13
  1. When you have spoken it, ’tis dead, and I am the grave of
  2. it.

Second French Lord Dumaine

14 - 17
  1. He hath perverted a young gentlewoman here in Florence, of a
  2. most chaste renown, and this night he fleshes his will in
  3. the spoil of her honor. He hath given her his monumental
  4. ring, and thinks himself made in the unchaste composition.

First French Lord Dumaine

18 - 19
  1. Now God delay our rebellion! As we are ourselves, what
  2. things are we!

Second French Lord Dumaine

20 - 24
  1. Merely our own traitors. And as in the common course of all
  2. treasons, we still see them reveal themselves, till they
  3. attain to their abhorr’d ends; so he that in this action
  4. contrives against his own nobility in his proper stream
  5. o’erflows himself.

First French Lord Dumaine

25 - 27
  1. Is it not meant damnable in us, to be trumpeters of our
  2. unlawful intents? We shall not then have his company
  3. tonight?

Second French Lord Dumaine

28
  1. Not till after midnight; for he is dieted to his hour.

First French Lord Dumaine

29 - 31
  1. That approaches apace. I would gladly have him see his
  2. company anatomiz’d, that he might take a measure of his own
  3. judgments, wherein so curiously he had set this counterfeit.

Second French Lord Dumaine

32 - 33
  1. We will not meddle with him till he come; for his presence
  2. must be the whip of the other.

First French Lord Dumaine

34
  1. In the meantime, what hear you of these wars?

Second French Lord Dumaine

35
  1. I hear there is an overture of peace.

First French Lord Dumaine

36
  1. Nay, I assure you a peace concluded.

Second French Lord Dumaine

37 - 38
  1. What will Count Roussillon do then? Will he travel higher,
  2. or return again into France?

First French Lord Dumaine

39 - 40
  1. I perceive by this demand, you are not altogether of his
  2. counsel.

Second French Lord Dumaine

41 - 42
  1. Let it be forbid, sir, so should I be a great deal of his
  2. act.

First French Lord Dumaine

43 - 48
  1. Sir, his wife some two months since fled from his house. Her
  2. pretense is a pilgrimage to Saint Jaques le Grand; which
  3. holy undertaking with most austere sanctimony she
  4. accomplish’d; and there residing, the tenderness of her
  5. nature became as a prey to her grief; in fine, made a groan
  6. of her last breath, and now she sings in heaven.

Second French Lord Dumaine

49
  1. How is this justified?

First French Lord Dumaine

50 - 53
  1. The stronger part of it by her own letters, which makes her
  2. story true, even to the point of her death. Her death
  3. itself, which could not be her office to say is come, was
  4. faithfully confirm’d by the rector of the place.

Second French Lord Dumaine

54
  1. Hath the Count all this intelligence?

First French Lord Dumaine

55 - 56
  1. Ay, and the particular confirmations, point from point, to
  2. the full arming of the verity.

Second French Lord Dumaine

57
  1. I am heartily sorry that he’ll be glad of this.

First French Lord Dumaine

58
  1. How mightily sometimes we make us comforts of our losses!

Second French Lord Dumaine

59 - 61
  1. And how mightily some other times we drown our gain in
  2. tears! The great dignity that his valor hath here acquir’d
  3. for him shall at home be encount’red with a shame as ample.

First French Lord Dumaine

62 - 67
  1. The web of our life is of a mingled yarn, good and ill
  2. together: our virtues would be proud, if our faults whipt
  3. them not, and our crimes would despair, if they were not
  4. cherish’d by our virtues.
  5. Enter a Messenger.
  6. How now? Where’s your master?

Messenger

68 - 70
  1. He met the Duke in the street, sir, of whom he hath taken a
  2. solemn leave. His lordship will next morning for France. The
  3. Duke hath offer’d him letters of commendations to the King.

Second French Lord Dumaine

71 - 72
  1. They shall be no more than needful there, if they were more
  2. than they can commend.
  1. Exit Messenger.
  1. Enter (Bertram) Count Roussillon.

First French Lord Dumaine

75 - 76
  1. They cannot be too sweet for the King’s tartness. Here’s his
  2. lordship now. How now, my lord, is’t not after midnight?

Bertram

77 - 83
  1. I have tonight dispatch’d sixteen businesses, a month’s
  2. length a-piece, by an abstract of success: I have congied
  3. with the Duke, done my adieu with his nearest; buried a
  4. wife, mourn’d for her, writ to my lady mother I am
  5. returning, entertain’d my convoy, and between these main
  6. parcels of dispatch effected many nicer needs. The last was
  7. the greatest, but that I have not ended yet.

Second French Lord Dumaine

84 - 85
  1. If the business be of any difficulty, and this morning your
  2. departure hence, it requires haste of your lordship.

Bertram

86 - 89
  1. I mean the business is not ended, as fearing to hear of it
  2. hereafter. But shall we have this dialogue between the fool
  3. and the soldier? Come, bring forth this counterfeit module,
  4. h’as deceiv’d me like a double-meaning prophesier.

Second French Lord Dumaine

90 - 91
  1. Bring him forth, h’as sate i’ th’ stocks all night, poor
  2. gallant knave.
  1. Exeunt Soldiers.

Bertram

93 - 94
  1. No matter, his heels have deserv’d it, in usurping his spurs
  2. so long. How does he carry himself?

Second French Lord Dumaine

95 - 100
  1. I have told your lordship already: the stocks carry him. But
  2. to answer you as you would be understood, he weeps like a
  3. wench that had shed her milk. He hath confess’d himself to
  4. Morgan, whom he supposes to be a friar, from the time of his
  5. remembrance to this very instant disaster of his setting i’
  6. th’ stocks; and what think you he hath confess’d?

Bertram

101
  1. Nothing of me, has ’a?

Second French Lord Dumaine

102 - 104
  1. His confession is taken, and it shall be read to his face.
  2. If your lordship be in’t, as I believe you are, you must
  3. have the patience to hear it.
  1. Enter Soldiers and Parolles, with First Soldier as his
  2. Interpreter.

Bertram

107
  1. A plague upon him! Muffled! He can say nothing of me.

First French Lord Dumaine

108
  1. Hush, hush! Hoodman comes! Portotartarossa.

First Soldier

109
  1. He calls for the tortures. What will you say without ’em?

Parolles

110 - 111
  1. I will confess what I know without constraint. If ye pinch
  2. me like a pasty, I can say no more.

First Soldier

112
  1. Bosko chimurcho.

First French Lord Dumaine

113
  1. Boblibindo chicurmurco.

First Soldier

114 - 115
  1. You are a merciful general. Our general bids you answer to
  2. what I shall ask you out of a note.

Parolles

116
  1. And truly, as I hope to live.

First Soldier

117 - 119
  1. Reads.
  2. First demand of him, how many horse the Duke is strong.”
  3. What say you to that?

Parolles

120 - 122
  1. Five or six thousand, but very weak and unserviceable. The
  2. troops are all scatter’d, and the commanders very poor
  3. rogues, upon my reputation and credit and as I hope to live.

First Soldier

123
  1. Shall I set down your answer so?

Parolles

124 - 125
  1. Do, I’ll take the sacrament on’t, how and which way you
  2. will.

Bertram

126
  1. All’s one to him. What a past-saving slave is this!

First French Lord Dumaine

127 - 130
  1. Y’ are deceiv’d, my lord, this is Monsieur Parolles, the
  2. gallant militaristthat was his own phrasethat had the
  3. whole theoric of war in the knot of his scarf, and the
  4. practice in the chape of his dagger.

Second French Lord Dumaine

131 - 133
  1. I will never trust a man again for keeping his sword clean,
  2. nor believe he can have every thing in him by wearing his
  3. apparel neatly.

First Soldier

134
  1. Well, that’s set down.

Parolles

135 - 136
  1. Five or six thousand horse,” I saidI will say true or
  2. thereabouts,” set down, for I’ll speak truth.

First French Lord Dumaine

137
  1. He’s very near the truth in this.

Bertram

138
  1. But I con him no thanks for’t, in the nature he delivers it.

Parolles

139
  1. Poor rogues,” I pray you say.

First Soldier

140
  1. Well, that’s set down.

Parolles

141 - 142
  1. I humbly thank you, sir. A truth’s a truth, the rogues are
  2. marvelous poor.

First Soldier

143 - 145
  1. Reads.
  2. Demand of him, of what strength they are afoot.”
  3. What say you to that?

Parolles

146 - 154
  1. By my troth, sir, if I were to live this present hour, I
  2. will tell true. Let me see: Spurio, a hundred and fifty;
  3. Sebastian, so many; Corambus, so many; Jaques, so many;
  4. Guiltian, Cosmo, Lodowick, and Gratii, two hundred fifty
  5. each; mine own company, Chitopher, Vaumond, Bentii, two
  6. hundred fifty each; so that the muster-file, rotten and
  7. sound, upon my life, amounts not to fifteen thousand pole,
  8. half of the which dare not shake the snow from off their
  9. cassocks, lest they shake themselves to pieces.

Bertram

155
  1. What shall be done to him?

First French Lord Dumaine

156 - 157
  1. Nothing, but let him have thanks. Demand of him my
  2. condition, and what credit I have with the Duke.

First Soldier

158 - 165
  1. Well, that’s set down.
  2. Reads.
  3. You shall demand of him, whether one Captain Dumaine be i’
  4. th’ camp, a Frenchman; what his reputation is with the Duke;
  5. what his valor, honesty, and expertness in wars; or whether
  6. he thinks it were not possible with well-weighing sums of
  7. gold to corrupt him to a revolt.”
  8. What say you to this? What do you know of it?

Parolles

166 - 167
  1. I beseech you let me answer to the particular of the
  2. inter’gatories. Demand them singly.

First Soldier

168
  1. Do you know this Captain Dumaine?

Parolles

169 - 171
  1. I know him. ’A was a botcher’s prentice in Paris, from
  2. whence he was whipt for getting the shrieve’s fool with
  3. child, a dumb innocent, that could not say him nay.

Bertram

172 - 173
  1. Nay, by your leave, hold your handsthough I know his brains
  2. are forfeit to the next tile that falls.

First Soldier

174
  1. Well, is this captain in the Duke of Florence’s camp?

Parolles

175
  1. Upon my knowledge, he is, and lousy.

First French Lord Dumaine

176 - 177
  1. Nay, look not so upon me; we shall hear of your lordship
  2. anon.

First Soldier

178
  1. What is his reputation with the Duke?

Parolles

179 - 181
  1. The Duke knows him for no other but a poor officer of mine,
  2. and writ to me this other day to turn him out a’ th’ band. I
  3. think I have his letter in my pocket.

First Soldier

182
  1. Marry, we’ll search.

Parolles

183 - 184
  1. In good sadness, I do not know. Either it is there, or it is
  2. upon a file with the Duke’s other letters in my tent.

First Soldier

185
  1. Here ’tis, here’s a paper. Shall I read it to you?

Parolles

186
  1. I do not know if it be it or no.

Bertram

187
  1. Our interpreter does it well.

First French Lord Dumaine

188
  1. Excellently.

First Soldier

189 - 190
  1. Reads.
  2. Dian, the Count’s a fool, and full of gold”—

Parolles

191 - 194
  1. That is not the Duke’s letter, sir; that is an advertisement
  2. to a proper maid in Florence, one Diana, to take heed of the
  3. allurement of one Count Roussillon, a foolish idle boy, but
  4. for all that very ruttish. I pray you, sir, put it up again.

First Soldier

195
  1. Nay, I’ll read it first, by your favor.

Parolles

196 - 199
  1. My meaning in’t, I protest, was very honest in the behalf of
  2. the maid; for I knew the young Count to be a dangerous and
  3. lascivious boy, who is a whale to virginity, and devours up
  4. all the fry it finds.

Bertram

200
  1. Damnable both-sides rogue!

First Soldier

201 - 211
  1. Reads the letter.
  2. When he swears oaths, bid him drop gold, and take it;
  3. After he scores, he never pays the score.
  4. Half won is match well made; match, and well make it;
  5. He ne’er pays after-debts, take it before,
  6. And say a soldier, Dian, told thee this:
  7. Men are to mell with, boys are not to kiss;
  8. For count of this, the Count’s a fool, I know it,
  9. Who pays before, but not when he does owe it.
  10. Thine, as he vow’d to thee in thine ear,
  11. Parolles.”

Bertram

212 - 213
  1. He shall be whipt through the army with this rhyme in ’s
  2. forehead.

Second French Lord Dumaine

214 - 215
  1. This is your devoted friend, sir, the manifold linguist and
  2. the armipotent soldier.

Bertram

216 - 217
  1. I could endure any thing before but a cat, and now he’s a
  2. cat to me.

First Soldier

218 - 219
  1. I perceive, sir, by the general’s looks, we shall be fain to
  2. hang you.

Parolles

220 - 223
  1. My life, sir, in any case! Not that I am afraid to die, but
  2. that my offenses being many, I would repent out the
  3. remainder of nature. Let me live, sir, in a dungeon, i’ th’
  4. stocks, or any where, so I may live.

First Soldier

224 - 227
  1. We’ll see what may be done, so you confess freely; therefore
  2. once more to this Captain Dumaine. You have answer’d to his
  3. reputation with the Duke, and to his valor; what is his
  4. honesty?

Parolles

228 - 237
  1. He will steal, sir, an egg out of a cloister. For rapes and
  2. ravishments he parallels Nessus. He professes not keeping of
  3. oaths; in breaking ’em he is stronger than Hercules. He will
  4. lie, sir, with such volubility, that you would think truth
  5. were a fool. Drunkenness is his best virtue, for he will be
  6. swine-drunk, and in his sleep he does little harm, save to
  7. his bed-clothes about him; but they know his conditions, and
  8. lay him in straw. I have but little more to say, sir, of his
  9. honesty. He has every thing that an honest man should not
  10. have; what an honest man should have, he has nothing.

First French Lord Dumaine

238
  1. I begin to love him for this.

Bertram

239 - 240
  1. For this description of thine honesty? A pox upon him for
  2. me, he’s more and more a cat.

First Soldier

241
  1. What say you to his expertness in war?

Parolles

242 - 247
  1. Faith, sir, h’as led the drum before the English tragedians.
  2. To belie him I will not, and more of his soldiership I know
  3. not, except in that country he had the honor to be the
  4. officer at a place there call’d Mile-end, to instruct for
  5. the doubling of files. I would do the man what honor I can,
  6. but of this I am not certain.

First French Lord Dumaine

248 - 249
  1. He hath out-villain’d villainy so far, that the rarity
  2. redeems him.

Bertram

250
  1. A pox on him, he’s a cat still.

First Soldier

251 - 252
  1. His qualities being at this poor price, I need not to ask
  2. you if gold will corrupt him to revolt.

Parolles

253 - 256
  1. Sir, for a cardecue he will sell the fee-simple of his
  2. salvation, the inheritance of it, and cut th’ entail from
  3. all remainders, and a perpetual succession for it
  4. perpetually.

First Soldier

257
  1. What’s his brother, the other Captain Dumaine?

Second French Lord Dumaine

258
  1. Why does he ask him of me?

First Soldier

259
  1. What’s he?

Parolles

260 - 264
  1. E’en a crow a’ th’ same nest; not altogether so great as the
  2. first in goodness, but greater a great deal in evil. He
  3. excels his brother for a coward, yet his brother is reputed
  4. one of the best that is. In a retreat he outruns any lackey;
  5. marry, in coming on he has the cramp.

First Soldier

265 - 266
  1. If your life be sav’d, will you undertake to betray the
  2. Florentine?

Parolles

267
  1. Ay, and the captain of his horse, Count Roussillon.

First Soldier

268
  1. I’ll whisper with the general, and know his pleasure.

Parolles

269 - 273
  1. Aside.
  2. I’ll no more drumming, a plague of all drums! Only to seem
  3. to deserve well, and to beguile the supposition of that
  4. lascivious young boy the Count, have I run into this danger.
  5. Yet who would have suspected an ambush where I was taken?

First Soldier

274 - 278
  1. There is no remedy, sir, but you must die. The general says,
  2. you that have so traitorously discover’d the secrets of your
  3. army, and made such pestiferous reports of men very nobly
  4. held, can serve the world for no honest use; therefore you
  5. must die. Come, headsman, off with his head.

Parolles

279
  1. O Lord, sir, let me live, or let me see my death!

First Soldier

280 - 282
  1. That shall you, and take your leave of all your friends.
  2. Unblinding him.
  3. So, look about you. Know you any here?

Bertram

283
  1. Good morrow, noble captain.

Second French Lord Dumaine

284
  1. God bless you, Captain Parolles.

First French Lord Dumaine

285
  1. God save you, noble captain.

Second French Lord Dumaine

286 - 287
  1. Captain, what greeting will you to my Lord Lafew? I am for
  2. France.

First French Lord Dumaine

288 - 290
  1. Good captain, will you give me a copy of the sonnet you writ
  2. to Diana in behalf of the Count Roussillon? And I were not a
  3. very coward, I’d compel it of you, but fare you well.
  1. Exeunt Bertram and Lords.

First Soldier

292 - 293
  1. You are undone, captain, all but your scarf; that has a knot
  2. on’t yet.

Parolles

294
  1. Who cannot be crush’d with a plot?

First Soldier

295 - 298
  1. If you could find out a country where but women were that
  2. had receiv’d so much shame, you might begin an impudent
  3. nation. Fare ye well, sir, I am for France too. We shall
  4. speak of you there.
  1. Exit with Soldiers.

Parolles

300 - 310
  1. Yet am I thankful. If my heart were great,
  2. ’Twould burst at this. Captain I’ll be no more,
  3. But I will eat and drink, and sleep as soft
  4. As captain shall. Simply the thing I am
  5. Shall make me live. Who knows himself a braggart,
  6. Let him fear this; for it will come to pass
  7. That every braggart shall be found an ass.
  8. Rust sword, cool blushes, and, Parolles, live
  9. Safest in shame! Being fool’d, by fool’ry thrive!
  10. There’s place and means for every man alive.
  11. I’ll after them.
  1. Exit.
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